Going To Your First Passover Seder? Here’s What You Need to Know

 

Passover is one of the most important holidays celebrated by Jews throughout the world. If you’ve been invited to a Passover Seder but you’ve never been to one, traditions vary from household to household. Learn the basics of Passover and the Passover Seder in just a few minutes. I publish this every year for those who are attending a Passover Seder for the first time. Note that this is a general guide. Very Orthodox Seders have these same basics but are usually conducted in Hebrew and are conducted somewhat differently. They are also a lot longer. This guide is primarily for Reform Jewish seders. 

When Is Passover Celebrated?

The 8-day holiday is celebrated in early Spring although the dates move around, anywhere from the 15th through the 22nd of the Hebrew month of Nissan.

As I am updating this story in 2023, Passover will start on Evening of Wed, Apr 5, 2023  for 7 days through the Evening of Thu, Apr 13, 2023

What is the Story of Passover and Why do Jews Celebrate it?

It is complicated, but here’s the quickest version possible:

Passover commemorates the emancipation of the Israelites from slavery in ancient Egypt.  During Passover, Jews follow specific rituals to remember honor the freedom that their ancestors won.

A newer interpretation reminds us that until all people are free, we are still slaves.

The leader of the family starts (this can be anyone) the seder by asking everyone to open their Haggadahs. This is a book that guides you through the story of Passover.

According to the story, told in any variation of the “Hagaddah” (Maxwell House used to make a popular version), the Israelites were slaves to the Egyptian pharaohs, who badly mistreated them for decades.

G‑d (Jews never spell out her name completely) seeing the injustice  sent Moses to Pharaoh with a message: “let my people go so that they may serve Me.”

But despite numerous warnings, Pharaoh refused to comply.  G‑d was not happy that his commandments weren’t being acknowledged so ten plagues were sent down to Egypt (including wild animals, boils, hail and locusts).

The plagues destroyed everything from the Pharoah’s livestock to their crops.

 Why is this Holiday Called Passover?

There was more bad news for the Pharoah. At the stroke of midnight on 15 Nissan in the year 2448 from creation (1313 BCE), G‑d levied the worst and last of the 10 plagues upon the Egyptians, killing all their firstborn.

The Children of Israel were spared because their houses had been marked, so death “passed over” their homes.

This is why the holiday is called Passover.

Pharaoh finally had to give in and he freed the slaves (actually they were chased out of Egypt).

600,000 adult males, plus many more women and children, left Egypt and began the trek to Mount Sinai and their birth as G‑d’s chosen people.

But they left in such haste that didn’t have time to bread for the journey. 

Enter, Matzoh!

As the Jews trudged to freedom walking in the hot sun, there was no time to let the dough for bread rise. So they baked unleavened “flatbreads” that they called Mazzah or Matzoh (there are other spellings). 

Matzoh is a mainstay of many homes all year long, but it has special significance on Passover, due to the flight out of Egypt!  

The Seder Table, Basic Traditions:

There are some important items you will see on a seder table, the most important being Matzoah (discussed above).

Everyone drinks wine or grape juice (four cups to celebrate the freedom of the Jews and their flight from Egypt). Speaking of wine, during the seder, Jews set an extra cup of wine on the dinner table and open the door for the enigmatic prophet Elijah, hoping he will enter.

You will see a bowl of chopped nuts and apples mixed with some sweet wine (charoset) symbolizing bricks and mortar used by the Israelites to make bricks while enslaved in Egypt.

Apart from Charoset that you’ll eat (delicious!) on the Seder plate there are other items on the seder plate with specific significance.

You will learn about them in the Haggadah but here they are:

You’ll see a lamb shankbone (it commemorates the paschal (lamb) sacrifice made the night the ancient Hebrews fled Egypt. 

You’ll find a hard-boiled egg to celebrate rebirth, or other things open to your interpretation. 

Karpas is a green vegetable. It’s usually parsley to symbolize Spring (again, a bit of interpretation might occur). This year we are using Cilantro.

Chazeret or bitter herbs are usually symbolized as horseradish.  Also, it denotes the bitterness of the life of the Israelite slaves in Egypt.

There will also be a small bowl of salt water to symbolize the tears and sweat of enslavement.

Some people begin the seder meal by dipping the parsley and the egg in a personal bowl of salt water, some also eat a bit of horseradish with a bit of the charoset.

You are not required to do it, but it’s nice to go along if everyone else at the table is doing it. 

The Four Questions: Reading of the Hagaddah

A highlight for some is the reading of the four questions. You’ll get to them in your Hagaddah.

The youngest child (or person) gets to start off a traditional part of the seder by asking Why is this night different from all other nights?” 

The seder leader replies by asking what differences they notice. The youngest person then replies that there are four ways in which they notice a difference about Passover.  

For some, the entire Haggadah is read detailing just about everything you ever wanted to know about the story of the Exodus from Egypt. It takes a long time.

There will be songs to sing in-between (not everyone does this).

Taking Turns:

I should mention that in most homes, the seder is conducted entirely in English. In ultra-orthodox homes it may be in Hebrew and read entirely by a group leader.

Mostly, everyone takes turns reading the Hagaddah, whether they are Jewish, or believe, or not. It’s rude not to participate if you can read. 

In some homes, only the four questions and the most important parts are read (and then you eat an opulent meal).

The seder is a good way to teach children about a very important part of Jewish culture and religion. 

We have discussed matzah but on the seder plate or on a special plate with a cover, there will be three pieces.

When the seder begins the top piece is shared by all at the table.

Another piece is “hidden” somewhere in the house, and the child who finds it (later after the seder ends) get money or a prize. 

More Traditions:

What really happens during a seder has to do with family traditions and how religious the family is. In my family we always read the four questions, then had a great meal. How much of the Hagaddah is read is entirely up to the person running the seder. 

One woman I know sings the Star-Spangled Banner before the meal (this is not an official part of any seder).

Another woman has made her own, feminist version of the Hagaddah (this is not really “kosher” but it fits the spirit of the holiday, I guess).

No matter what, there is reading or some or all of the Hagaddah and the story of Passover, and there is a beautiful seder plate.

Most Jews leave an empty seat or a cup of wine left for Elijah (hoping s/he will come). Often they’ll keep the door open for Elijah. According to tradition, s/he will arrive one day as an unknown guest to herald the advent of the Messiah.

No Bread!

Be sure that if you bring something it is “Kosher for Passover” and definitely doesn’t have bread or wheat (You’ve already read why). Bringing something is not required! 

In fact, observant Jews don’t eat bread or any leavened grain items for the full eight days.

The conservative and orthodox Jews clean their entire house of these items before Passover. They use special plates and dishes and implements just for Passover. That way they get rid of any breadcrumbs.   

Like the old Levy’s Rye Bread advertising line: you don’t have to be Jewish to enjoy it.  This photo is of a seder at the White House.

Jews traditionally invite people who don’t have a seder of their own to attend, and non-Jews to join them. 

This isn’t to convert anyone, but just to enjoy good food, wine, companionship, and to hear the ancient story told, one more time, this year.

Happy Passover!